Best Bike Light I've Ever Owned, The Owleye LED

Nobody ever gets bike lights quite right.  Seriously, I'm not sure who is running these bike accessory departments, but they definitely must not actually ride their bike.Owleye Bike Lights  And I don't care how many kickstarter bike light projects there are, most leave some important element out. I'd say there are a few very important characteristics a bike light MUST have:

  • Compact
  • Bright
  • Efficient Battery
  • Rechargeable Battery
  • Removeable
  • Reasonable Price
  • Simple attachment mechanism
  • 1 or 2 modes, I DON'T need 5 fucking blinky modes!!!!!!
  • Durable i.e. Drop Proof & Water Proof

Luckily, after years of searching I finally found THE ideal bike light at a local sports shop. Drum roll please!  Introducing the Owleye HighLux5 LED Rechargeable Lithium Ion headlight and rear light.  Seriously, this is the PERFECT light, and it's made by some obscure company in Taiwan who needs a little help  translating their marketing material (call me Owleye).  

And when I say Owleye, I mean ONE of their models specifically, the HighLux5.  

Owleye Front LightOwleye Rear Light

Owleyes solar lights suck major balls.  Seriously, if you threw them in to a solar storm they might last 10 minutes... But the HighLux5, hot damn, it's the Marissa Miller of bike lights, god damn perfection.

Lets do the break down:

  • Compact: YES, smaller then a zippo, when they are both in my pocket it doesn't look like I'm happy to see you, it looks like a small cell phone, talking like mid 2000's cell phone, not the giant smart phone paddles we have today.
  • Bright: Holy Balls, YES.  One time I was biking behind two douches in a Mustang, (yeah, go figure) and we hit a stoplight.  One of the guys yells back out the window and tells me to turn of my brights, not realizing I was on a bike, yeah my brights..  I say it's a fucking bike light asshole, and thank god the light turned green, or else I would have had to kick their asses.
  • Efficient battery: YES, it's got a lithium ion battery, about the same size as what you have in your cell phone, so it's lasts and lasts (that's what she said, but of course I'm a god damn stallion)
  • Rechargeable battery: YES, and it's with a standard USB cable (Hey Blakburn, yeah, we don't need some retarded proprietary adaptor), which probably 90% of people have one or two laying around, not to mention the one they include which is a nice compact length.
  • Removable: YES, and super easy too, you don't have to disarm some booby trap of a attachment mechanim, its one simple push down latch.
  • Reasonable Price: Kinda, ok I'll give it a YES, $30 a pop isn't super cheap, but these suckers will last you longer than anything else out there and are as bright as most lights that cost $100's dollars.
  • Simple Attachment Mechanism: YES, zip ties, or just a wrap around rubber strap.  Now they changed the design a little bit lately.  The first one they came out with was just two zip ties and a super simple plastic attachment mechanism, now they've made it a simple rubber strap, which is ok, but slightly less theft proof.
  • 1 or 2 Modes: YES, for the love of god yes!  Click once, light goes on, click twice, light goes off.  HOW HARD IS THAT?
  • Durable: I've had my lights for 1 year and 1.5 years respecitvley.  I've dropped the front one numerous times and they've been left in the rain on many occasion, and they keep on trucking.  Now if they were Knog's they would have been shit canned after about a week.

Owleye Bike Lights

So there you have it folks, the perfect bike light!  Thank you Owleye!  Now don't fuck it up and go changing things.

So some of you will say, waaaa, what about Kickstarter??  Most of the Kickstarter projects are really cool and made by some artisan hipster from Brooklyn or Portland, so of course they are cool.  But they are damn expensive!  Everyone knows that when it comes to bike lights, unlike Beer, there is no skimping on cost for hipsters.  Other times they are waaaay over engineered, like some they found some German engeineer and said here, go hog wild on a bike light.  And then there is the permanent movement, where they are permanently attaching them to your bicycle in some way.  Well I park my bike outside a lot and guess what, some crack head is going to find a way to pull that shit off of there, or at least steal the batteries.

So that leaves us with established companies, like Planet Bike or Knog, or some crazy expensive light gizmo.  Let me state first, Knog sucks balls.  NEVER buy a Knog light, ever.  First, you even get a little moisture on them they will die, second the battery lasts about as long as a freshman in highschool getting his first handy and last they are all rubbery and fit in your pocket for shit.  Not to metion they are overpriced for what you get.  Basically a cheap as china town light mechanism wrapped in some rubber.  Planet Bike, well they innovate about as much as Microsoft.  They are super bulky since they use AA batteries and don't even get me started on their attachment mechanism.  It's usually really stupid.  And the same complaints go for most other companies too.  Look at this monstrosity from Blackburn, my god, you put that on your handlebars you might end up going over them because of the weight.

Don't even get me started on blink modes.  For christ sake, I need ONE constant mode and ONE blinky mode if I want to save battery!  I don't need 10 different blinking set ups, what do I need to signal somebody in morse code with my bike light!?  Hey bike light companies, STOP IT!  SO yeah, get a pair of Owleye's, you will thank me!